I just ate a baby.

~

In other news…

I had a totally rad blog post planned and it fell apart. I’m sorry. The next blog post won’t be until September 3rd, probably.

Yeah. I know. I’m failing you.

The upside to this is that I’m going to Florida, and will most likely have some outrageous Florida stories to tell you guys when I get back. And if nothing happens, I’ll kill someone on my last day. That should spice things up.

~

Um… So this isn’t totally irrelevant, wanna listen to me whine about how I wanna be sterilized but practically no doctors are willing to do it unless you’re like 30 and already have children?

Fuck fuck fuck.

I DON’T WANT A BABY/PARASITE INSIDE ME GOD DAMMIT. I will do anything to make sure that doesn’t happen. (Pro-choice, natch).

Anyway. I wanna adopt a sweet little eight year old who knows how to read, write, and is potty trained. Skip all the baby bullshit.

Yeah, that’s kind of lazy. But fuck it.

I have a life to live.

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