One of my last few posts before my hiatus detailed my experience getting an industrial piercing in my right ear. For the most part, it wasn’t so bad. The piercing itself was painful for about two days, and then the pain went away and I was left with a really cool looking piercing that would need some upkeep, but would supposedly bother me no more.

Lies.

Here are a few things you should know if you’re considering getting an industrial piercing. No one told me these things, because, I don’t know, everyone else who has one is an asshole who doesn’t like sharing information with the world like I do.

1. They Take For-Fucking-Ever to Heal

Alright, I’ll admit, I had already known that the industrial piercing took longer than most other piercings to heal. ‘But whatever,’ I thought, ‘I can deal with a longer healing time. It’s in my ear, so it’s no biggie.’

Actually, it’s a huge fucking biggie. Every time I go to clean the damn thing, (which I have to do three times a day), there’s some new crusty mixture of blood and shit that I assume was never meant to see the light of day.

Nope, it's not pie crust, (unfortunately).

The piercing itself also likes to get stuck in the funk, so I can’t even play with the piercing and twirl it around like a baton, which I would like to be able to. For reasons.

Look at how much fun she's having!

2. Everything Will Try To Infect It

When I first got my piercing, I had some vague knowledge of infections. I knew you probably shouldn’t rub dirt on the piercing or let people tongue-fuck it or whatever, but apparently there is a wide range of things trying to poison your piercing and make your ear fall off.

  • Hair
  • Glasses
  • Phones
  • Pillowcases
  • Fucking anything your ear comes in the slightest contact with

The important thing to remember here is that, with the industrial piercing, you’ve got two relatively large, (for things that have been stabbed through your ear), open wounds that are just chilling and taking their sweet, sweet time to heal.

And it’s important to keep that in mind, because, as soon as you get the piercing…

3. It Will Create It’s Own Gravitational Pull

Like this, I guess.

Okay, not really. It’s just a piercing, not a small bar-shaped planet.

But I swear to God, ever since I got my industrial, everyone and their mother is trying to touch it.

Whether they’re patting me on the head, smashing their ear against mine as we hug, trying to run their fingers through my hair, putting my glasses on me, it all ends in excruciating pain. I’ve grown quite accustom to ducking and screaming, “My ear! My ear!” Before anyone even gets within a foot of the piercing. Because like I said, they’re open wounds. If I shot you in the stomach and then tried to jam my finger in there, you’d be less than pleased about it too.

Now, does all this mean that industrial piercings suck ass and you should never get one? Of course not. They’re fucking awesome. Just keep the above information in mind. There are enough surprises in life.

P.S. And if you like tucking your hair behind your ear, you can kiss that goodbye, too!

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